Pastor Tricia's Ramblings

There’s no room in that statement for halfway Christianity. No room for apology. Following Jesus requires death—death to our pride, our comfort, our plans, and our sin. It’s not optional. It’s essential.

And yet, here’s the beautiful paradox: when we die to ourselves, we truly begin to live.

The Call to Die

Jesus said in John 12:24–26,

“Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves me, he must follow me; and where I am, there will my servant be also. If anyone serves me, the Father will honor him.”

The path of fruitfulness begins with a funeral—ours. Just as a seed must fall into the ground and die before it can produce fruit, so we must die to ourselves before Christ can live fully in us. We say we want to follow Jesus, but we often want resurrection power without crucifixion pain.

Jesus didn’t sugarcoat discipleship. He said plainly, “If anyone serves me, he must follow me.” That’s not an invitation to convenience. It’s a call to surrender. The cross was not decorative—it was deadly. And yet, it was the doorway to life.

So let’s ask a hard question: Are we actually following Jesus—or just admiring Him from a safe distance?

The Flesh That Refuses to Die

Here’s the truth most of us don’t like to admit: our flesh doesn’t go quietly. It kicks, screams, and throws tantrums. It craves comfort, ease, control, and attention. It doesn’t want to pray. It doesn’t want to forgive. It doesn’t want to be humble. The flesh wants to stay in charge.

We say, “Lord, I surrender,” but then the flesh whispers, “Just this once…”

Just this one show.

Just this one lie.

Just this one moment to gossip.

Just this one scroll through that account you know stirs up envy or lust.

And before we know it, the flesh—though it’s supposed to be dead—is running our lives again.

I once knew a woman who loved her cat dearly. When the cat died, she couldn’t bear to part with it. So she had it stuffed and placed on a little cat bed in her room. From a distance, it looked alive, but up close, it was stiff and cold. Petting that cat didn’t bring her comfort anymore—it was just a reminder of what used to be.

That’s what it’s like when we cling to our flesh. We hold on to a corpse. We remember the moments of pleasure, the feelings of control, the taste of sin—but we forget the emptiness it left behind.

Your flesh is your stuffed cat. It’s dead. It can’t love you back. It can’t satisfy your soul. And yet, we keep trying to stroke it back to life.

If you are in Christ, that old life is gone. You’ve been crucified with Him (Galatians 2:20). Stop feeding what God has already buried.

The Spirit That Gives Life

The good news is, God didn’t leave us alone in this fight. He gave us His Spirit—His very presence—to empower us to live differently.

Romans 8:9–14 says:

“You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you… If Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness… For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God.”

The same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead lives inside of you. Think about that. The very power that rolled away the stone and called Him out of the tomb now pulses through your life. You don’t have to live defeated. You don’t have to obey the old master.

But notice Paul’s words: “If by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.” That means you have a role to play. The Spirit gives the strength—but you must choose obedience.

It’s daily. Sometimes hourly. Sometimes moment by moment. You say no when your flesh screams yes. You step away from the gossip. You shut the laptop. You block the number. You speak truth when fear tempts you to stay silent.

You crucify the flesh—not out of legalism—but out of love. Because you know the One who lives in you is better than anything your flesh promises.

Who’s Leading You?

Paul asks us in Romans 8 to consider who’s really leading our lives. If you’re led by the Spirit, you are a child of God. But if you’re led by your desires, your phone, your emotions, or your friends, then something else is sitting on the throne of your heart.

So ask yourself:

Who’s leading me today?

Is it the Spirit of God—or the world around me?

Technology leads many of us more than the Holy Spirit does. We reach for our phones before we reach for our Bibles. We scroll for hours but can’t spend ten minutes in prayer. We fill our minds with noise, then wonder why we can’t hear God’s voice.

If you want to walk in the power of the Spirit, you must make room for Him. He won’t compete with the clutter.

When the Cross Feels Too Heavy

There are days when carrying your cross feels impossible. When saying no to sin feels exhausting. When following Jesus costs you relationships, opportunities, or comfort.

You might wonder, “Is it worth it?”

Yes. A thousand times yes.

Because every time you choose obedience over ease, the Spirit strengthens you. Every time you die to self, Christ’s life grows stronger in you. And one day, the Father will honor you—just as Jesus promised in John 12:26.

God sees every quiet surrender, every hidden sacrifice, every time you pick up your cross when no one is watching. He honors those moments. They’re not wasted. They’re worship.

No Apology Faith

We don’t need to apologize for standing on the Word of God. We don’t need to soften it to fit in or blend it to avoid backlash. Truth doesn’t change just because culture does.

We can speak truth without being harsh. We can love people without compromising. Jesus was full of grace and truth—not one without the other.

Being bold doesn’t mean being rude—it means being clear. It means standing on the conviction that if Jesus said it, we believe it, live it, and proclaim it. Period.

The world will call you judgmental. The enemy will whisper that you’re too extreme. But remember—Jesus was crucified not because He was silent, but because He was bold. He declared the truth unapologetically. And He calls us to do the same.

Practical Ways to Live Boldly

1. Start your day surrendered. Before your feet hit the floor, pray: “Lord, I die to myself today. Lead me by Your Spirit.” It’s a declaration of dependence.
2. Guard your influences. Who and what shapes your thoughts? If your music, movies, or media dull your sensitivity to the Spirit, it’s time to fast from them.
3. Speak truth in love. Don’t be afraid to share Scripture, even when it’s unpopular. Just do it with humility and compassion.
4. Say no to secret sin. Bring darkness into the light. Confess. Repent. Replace it with worship and Word.
5. Stay in community. You can’t carry your cross alone. Surround yourself with believers who will remind you who you are in Christ when your flesh screams otherwise.
6. Remember eternity. The temporary cost of obedience is nothing compared to the eternal glory waiting for you. Don’t trade forever for a fleeting moment of comfort.

The Cross Leads to Life

The cross doesn’t end in death—it ends in resurrection. Every time you crucify your flesh, something new is born. Peace replaces turmoil. Joy replaces guilt. Power replaces weakness.

You don’t lose your life by surrendering to Christ—you find it.

Jesus said, “Whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 16:25)

So today, don’t apologize for your faith. Don’t shrink back. Don’t live halfway. Pick up your cross, deny yourself, and follow Him with boldness.

Because the One who called you is worth it all.

Final thought:

If the Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead lives in you, you have resurrection power flowing through your veins. Live like it. Be unashamed. Be bold. Be Spirit-led. The world doesn’t need another polite, passive Christian—it needs a Church alive with resurrection fire.

Live Bold. Live Set Free. Live for Christ.